Something's Happening...

Something's happening and it's "magical"...

First, I asked God for a good parking spot last week at the busiest shopping mall in town because I had a quick errand, not much time, and had had a particularly difficult day (having nothing to do with the holiday season). I got a front row spot immediately. So when I left, I prayed that the person getting my spot would be someone else who was having an extra hard day. I assume God answered my prayer.

Second, I went to the grocery store today and from the looks of the parking lot, it was very crowded due to holiday dinner shopping and a snowstorm coming. I didn't pray for a spot, but turned on my blinker when someone was leaving. Just as I went to pull in, another car pulled through from the other side. HOWEVER, when the driver saw me, he backed up and gave me the spot!

I pulled in and waved at him, mouthing the words "Thank You!!" He was not, by the way, the elderly gentleman one would expect to do such a kind deed, but a young man driving a yellow "hot rod" and at any other location might have appeared to be a member of a gang. I said a prayer for him, that he would be blessed in some way this holiday season.

Third, just today I wished for a cup of Christmas tea with a dear friend and then she asked me to drop by. Her table was lit with a balsam candle and set with beautiful red and white dishes along with her homemade Christmas cookies and teas for me to choose from. I felt loved by her and by God. This had nothing to do with parking spots, but with suddenly asking for things and being aware of God giving them to me.

If God is that thoughtful and giving in small things, a friend said to me, then He/She is no doubt wanting to bless me in the big things. I just need to ask, believe, and be open to how my prayers are answered. May all your prayers be answered for your highest good this holiday season and may your 2010 be the best year yet in your 12-step recovery!

Sad and Serene

My sponsor tells me I'm grieving my relationship with my parents, that it will never be what I wanted as a child, a young adult, and now a middle-aged woman. I realized at a meeting yesterday that being sad, which is a feeling one gets from grief, is okay. That I can still be serene. In other words, serenity doesn't mean happiness - jumping up and down with joy. It means contentment and acceptance. This really helped me to realize that it's okay to feel sad. It's part of my process in recovery. Plus, just realizing this lifted my spirits since I stopped beating myself up over being sad. It is what it is, and today is a better day.